I haven't been keeping up with this on the blog. Oops. I also haven't been doing these challenges as well as I could. A little preoccupied, I suppose. Anyway, here are the latest 4 weeks.
Week 10 - Forgiveness: Repent
I started this one rather late as I didn't see it until the end of the week, so I did it in conjunction with the next week. Anyway, this week I was to spend time in prayer, asking what I needed to repent of. And I found a few things that needed adjusting in my heart. I won't get into them here, but mainly I wanted to be more loving of those I didn't understand, specifically those who hate me just because I believe differently. This has been tested a lot the last few weeks with some of the stuff that has come up in our area recently. It has not been an easy journey, as I need to continue to focus on God's love, not my own.
Week 11- Give up Control
This was a big one! I've always been a control freak... although having kids has shown me that I cannot control everything, nor do I even want to. I mean, having to control things really is a lot of work, stress, and not much fun either. We were asked on face book to write these things down ... "I surrender _____" and then shred the paper. I didn't do that (not sure why, would have been a good exercise). Instead I wrote about them in my diary. I wanted to do one per day, but only did 4. The farm, my children, our future, and my eczema (well, more specifics to each as well, but this is sufficient for the blog, ha ha). It is not easy some days... I think I have actually taken some of these things back, and I need to surrender them on a daily basis.
Week 12 - Rest
Oi. This was talking about removing chaos, saying no to too many extras, making time for rest/sleep, and letting go of things that don't serve me or my family. For me, the most difficult thing was sleep... going to bed earlier and trying to nap. I have already been saying no to a lot (because I CANNOT physically do these extras). I also need to prune my to-do list. This is something I did, and am attempting to do more and more. Getting to bed earlier is still a difficult thing however, and I'm not really sure I did as well on this as I could have.
Week 13 - Eat more Green Foods
The challenge was to eat one green salad per day. I actually did great on this one! The hardest thing was to make sure that I had greens in the house. I only didn't have salad on Sunday. Otherwise I had at least one per day... 4 days I had 2 salads (and a green smoothie on one day as well). I wish I would have had more greens today, but we did have vegetables either way, so I'm glad about that. Now to continue this.
Week 14 will start this week. I look forward to it.
As for other 'healing' things I have been attempting -
Oil Swishing - been doing this for 2 weeks now, and I'm not sure it's been doing anything, in all honesty. To do so, you take about 1 tablespoon of coconut oil (other oils work too, apparently) and swish it around in your mouth from 15-20 minutes, first thing in the morning before you drink or eat anything. Then you brush your teeth and scrape your tongue, and floss. Then you continue on with your day. It's not a fun thing, but it isn't difficult either, and I generally do it while feeding our daughter, changing her diaper, and doing devotions.
No Shampoo - Actually, also no conditioner or soap. Sounds odd, I know. I've been using baking soda mixed with water as my 'shampoo' and apple cider vinegar as 'conditioner'. I also used baking soda as a 'soap' of sorts (it's a deodorizer). I have been doing this 2 weeks as well, and my skin is softer. My hair feels so much nicer now that I'm over that initial 'greasy' feeling that comes with no longer having your hair stripped of its natural oils by the shampoo. I actually have some volume to my hair! It is great! And yes, it is clean, too! As for lotion... haven't been using any for a long time now since it all affects me negatively. However, my eczema has now been showing up in a few other places. I'm not sure why... since I've been reducing my toxins going on my body! Only thing I can think of is that maybe my body is sort of detoxing and removing toxins through the skin is causing more of a breakout. We'll see. I've been trying to eat coconut oil on crackers or toast or something as it is supposed to help eczema when consumed as well. I also use it as moisturizer.
Water - I need to drink more... yup... but I've been having 6 cups a day at least, plus one cup of chamomile tea. It also helps the baby to sleep at night.
Sugar - epic fail. I've still just been eating about everything in sight. I can't help it, I feel half starved all the time. I am trying to pick healthier items, but lately it has been difficult. I made some cookies with no sugar (date paste, great stuff), but they did have chocolate chips. I made some white cookies for Easter and have eaten some. OK, a lot. And other desserts on Sundays especially... major fail. But our meals are still healthy and less processed. I think this will be something we continue. OK, I really want to continue (there will be the odd day where we won't do as well). The sugar thing is over now, but I only really made it 55 days. Sigh. The last 35 was off and on.
Sleep - Fail again. I'm still up and it's 11pm. Time to try to go to bed. But first, gotta try to get A to sleep. She does well at night once we get her to fall asleep. Right now we generally get 6-7 hours between feedings during the night! It's nice. Really nice! My husband doesn't even wake up at all during the night when I do have to, because she doesn't wake crying... I wake up to her sucking her fist half asleep, and then I feed her anyway.
Bedtime for me! Hope you all have a great week (and I'm looking forward to finding out what this week's challenge will be).
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Saturday, March 2, 2013
The Sugar Challenge - a recap
Those who've been
following my blog know of my participation in the 52 week Whole Healing
Challenge. I think that God brought me into this challenge for a really good
reason. This delivery proved that to me.
First, the 90 days of no sugar. I've changed that for myself, allowing myself sweeteners like honey, molasses, and maple syrup in very small amounts. This way I could bake and have these things that I found a lifeline in nursing during the night, just without processed sugar. I have been doing very well on the challenge, and told my husband that when I was in the hospital, I would not question the food brought to me, and just eat what I was given, even though it likely had sugars in it. So, since Monday, I know I've had sugar. However, I only used a tiny bit of sugar in the oatmeal and cream of wheat given during the breakfasts (I needed to eat everything... you don't get a lot of food in there). I didn't use syrups or anything at all with my meals otherwise. And the juices I drank anyway, even though I eliminated those from my diet as well. I needed them after the blood loss, the shakes, and for milk production. So, I did 'fall' on my challenge during this week, but I don't feel I failed at all. Now that I'm at home again, no desserts for me besides those that I made myself, fruits, etc. But this isn't the major thing I wanted to talk about...
It's about my blood loss, hemoglobin levels, and what the 55 days of no processed sugars up until my daughter's birth already did for me.
I mentioned earlier on my birth story that they were not expecting my hemoglobin to be as high as it was with the 2L+ blood loss, hemorraging, etc. They told me it was 88. The doctor suspects it will be at 95 'points' in a week. Normal is 120-150. (just did a little research now, haha). I suspect the reason my levels were 'higher' than expected, is that I went in with higher levels than many might have had. Why? The foods that help raise hemoglobin were things I was consuming in large amounts during my no sugar cleanse. Avocados, dates, beets (never had them before this challenge), bananas, oranges, spinach, red meats, tomato paste, berries, nuts (ate lots of these), and other various foods that I usually wouldn't have in the house. I consumed so many of these things! And most of the meals in the deep freeze are made with these foods (and beef)! I am praying that my levels will increase quickly, but I think God knew all along what was going to happen and made all these things possible right from the beginning of this year. Not only that, but even my ways of nesting brought things about in such a way that I am better prepared for this low energy. I just need to be careful and force myself not to do anything. Like taking the stairs too often for laundry. Or carrying heavy items.
Another thing to note... I usually have low iron. I'm usually with a lower level of 'hemoglobin' and while not anemic, sometimes I seem pretty close to. Nothing bad, just on the lower side of 'normal'. I had to have been with a higher level in order to be 'ok' without a transfusion. And I'm glad. I don't want a transfusion.
I guess I am just so awed that God started taking care of me in this way so far ahead of time, without me even knowing it. I am praying my levels will improve quickly, that I will not get bad blood loss at all in the coming weeks, no more hemorraging, and that I will heal quickly. My kids don't seem to be affected right now, and my milk production hasnt been affected beyond starting a little late. I'm dealing with similar issues that I had with my firstborn... engorgement, and our little A is choking with how much milk I'm producing now. I am hoping this will remedy itself in short order... the pain is not fun to deal with.
I still am not making food myself, which means I'm eating more of 'whatever' I have in the house. Some of the things my mother in law brings over (ok... most of them) are prepackaged items that I shouldn't eat on this challenge, but my husband is making the meals now, and they are still healthier than what I was being served in the hospital, in my opinion (seriously, for breakfast one morning there was a slice of processed cheese as the protein source. Processed cheese. I haven't had that stuff in months and refuse to buy it again once the stuff we have is gone. I mean, it's not terrible, but I thought it was funny being given certain things in the hospital). We had a free pizza (coupon given with the Welcome Wagon stuff) yesturday for supper along with chicken fingers my Mother in law brought as well. I couldn't even eat those, haha. I'm so used to my homemade ones that these packaged foods just don't taste like food anymore. Odd, isn't it? I'm eating a lot of nuts right now, dates, and I'd love to make more avocado pudding, but that requires standing for a long period of time, and I'm finding that rather difficult for some reason. But, we have food, and our church will be bringing some meals which is such a blessing! Again, I am eating whatever I can right now until I heal enough to make things myself. So, while I am not following this challenge perfectly right now, I'm still doing what I can.
And it has benefitted me immensely already! I feel so blessed. I feel that God has had this all in His plan for me to begin with, and that by stepping out and taking the challenge (which a part of me thought I was silly to do considering the circumstances), I listened to Him and actually made things much better for myself and my family in the long run. I wasn't forced to stay in the hospital for terribly long. I wasn't given a blood transfusion. I didn't even pass out and was able to nurse our daughter. I am blessed!
Lord, Thank you so much for the plans you have for us. Thank you for guiding us and showing us Your will, even though we cannot see the future or know why we are led to do certain things. You are an amazing God, and I am so blessed.
First, the 90 days of no sugar. I've changed that for myself, allowing myself sweeteners like honey, molasses, and maple syrup in very small amounts. This way I could bake and have these things that I found a lifeline in nursing during the night, just without processed sugar. I have been doing very well on the challenge, and told my husband that when I was in the hospital, I would not question the food brought to me, and just eat what I was given, even though it likely had sugars in it. So, since Monday, I know I've had sugar. However, I only used a tiny bit of sugar in the oatmeal and cream of wheat given during the breakfasts (I needed to eat everything... you don't get a lot of food in there). I didn't use syrups or anything at all with my meals otherwise. And the juices I drank anyway, even though I eliminated those from my diet as well. I needed them after the blood loss, the shakes, and for milk production. So, I did 'fall' on my challenge during this week, but I don't feel I failed at all. Now that I'm at home again, no desserts for me besides those that I made myself, fruits, etc. But this isn't the major thing I wanted to talk about...
It's about my blood loss, hemoglobin levels, and what the 55 days of no processed sugars up until my daughter's birth already did for me.
I mentioned earlier on my birth story that they were not expecting my hemoglobin to be as high as it was with the 2L+ blood loss, hemorraging, etc. They told me it was 88. The doctor suspects it will be at 95 'points' in a week. Normal is 120-150. (just did a little research now, haha). I suspect the reason my levels were 'higher' than expected, is that I went in with higher levels than many might have had. Why? The foods that help raise hemoglobin were things I was consuming in large amounts during my no sugar cleanse. Avocados, dates, beets (never had them before this challenge), bananas, oranges, spinach, red meats, tomato paste, berries, nuts (ate lots of these), and other various foods that I usually wouldn't have in the house. I consumed so many of these things! And most of the meals in the deep freeze are made with these foods (and beef)! I am praying that my levels will increase quickly, but I think God knew all along what was going to happen and made all these things possible right from the beginning of this year. Not only that, but even my ways of nesting brought things about in such a way that I am better prepared for this low energy. I just need to be careful and force myself not to do anything. Like taking the stairs too often for laundry. Or carrying heavy items.
Another thing to note... I usually have low iron. I'm usually with a lower level of 'hemoglobin' and while not anemic, sometimes I seem pretty close to. Nothing bad, just on the lower side of 'normal'. I had to have been with a higher level in order to be 'ok' without a transfusion. And I'm glad. I don't want a transfusion.
I guess I am just so awed that God started taking care of me in this way so far ahead of time, without me even knowing it. I am praying my levels will improve quickly, that I will not get bad blood loss at all in the coming weeks, no more hemorraging, and that I will heal quickly. My kids don't seem to be affected right now, and my milk production hasnt been affected beyond starting a little late. I'm dealing with similar issues that I had with my firstborn... engorgement, and our little A is choking with how much milk I'm producing now. I am hoping this will remedy itself in short order... the pain is not fun to deal with.
I still am not making food myself, which means I'm eating more of 'whatever' I have in the house. Some of the things my mother in law brings over (ok... most of them) are prepackaged items that I shouldn't eat on this challenge, but my husband is making the meals now, and they are still healthier than what I was being served in the hospital, in my opinion (seriously, for breakfast one morning there was a slice of processed cheese as the protein source. Processed cheese. I haven't had that stuff in months and refuse to buy it again once the stuff we have is gone. I mean, it's not terrible, but I thought it was funny being given certain things in the hospital). We had a free pizza (coupon given with the Welcome Wagon stuff) yesturday for supper along with chicken fingers my Mother in law brought as well. I couldn't even eat those, haha. I'm so used to my homemade ones that these packaged foods just don't taste like food anymore. Odd, isn't it? I'm eating a lot of nuts right now, dates, and I'd love to make more avocado pudding, but that requires standing for a long period of time, and I'm finding that rather difficult for some reason. But, we have food, and our church will be bringing some meals which is such a blessing! Again, I am eating whatever I can right now until I heal enough to make things myself. So, while I am not following this challenge perfectly right now, I'm still doing what I can.
And it has benefitted me immensely already! I feel so blessed. I feel that God has had this all in His plan for me to begin with, and that by stepping out and taking the challenge (which a part of me thought I was silly to do considering the circumstances), I listened to Him and actually made things much better for myself and my family in the long run. I wasn't forced to stay in the hospital for terribly long. I wasn't given a blood transfusion. I didn't even pass out and was able to nurse our daughter. I am blessed!
Lord, Thank you so much for the plans you have for us. Thank you for guiding us and showing us Your will, even though we cannot see the future or know why we are led to do certain things. You are an amazing God, and I am so blessed.
A New Arrival!
Guess what? Monday at 6:51pm, our daughter was born! For the sake of this blog, I'll be calling her A (funny joke, we didn't name her for 2-3 days, and my brother suggested we name her 'A', and the next one 'B'... etc, lol). This is our birth story.
Wednesday, before my due date, I started getting a lot of timeable contractions at 10min apart. They would quit for an hour or so, and start up again, so I knew they weren't the real deal. I had them when sitting, standing, shopping, sleeping... it was ridiculous. They continued through the whole weekend. By Sunday I told my husband I wasn't timing them anymore. I was done. I had been questioning labour for 3-4 days now, and my emotions were a wreck. I spent the day blissfully ignoring contractions, praying that God would just let me know.
Midnight on Sunday/Monday I woke up with another one of those silly untimeable light contractions... which gave me the runs and the shakes all at the same time. We went to the hospital to find out why I had shakes so bad for 20 minutes straight, as I was still shaking when we got in the van and strongly felt something was wrong. My in laws came to watch the kids.
Everything seemed fine, and they checked me and said I was 5 cm. We stayed at the hospital, and hours later was said to be 7 cm. No pain, and I was thrilled. Day shift nurse tried to get me to help these contractions get closer, and later on checked me to find... I was 3 cm, and probably had been there awhile. Baby's head was making measuring difficult. So, we waited a little longer to check once more to see if there was any change. None. Left the hospital around noon. Went home crying. I was so hoping to leave with a baby, and instead I was leaving as having been in false labor... and I didn't go in thinking I was in labor to begin with, just concerned with why I was shaking. I felt a little ridiculous.
After lunch we went for naps and I was having those same stupid contractions. When I woke up they were different... closer. 5 minutes apart and stronger than they had been. Chuck was about to go to the barn, and I told him to wait (it was shortly after 4 when I woke up). Within 15 minutes we figured out this was probably the real deal, and went in... again... this time arriving at 5pm.
I was not allowed to leave the room as the contractions were right on top of each other very quickly. I used the ball, which was nice until they needed to strap me into monitors on the bed yet again. Then they got me the phentanol since anything else could harm the baby at this point. I didn't have it for terribly many contractions... they checked me and I was almost done... only a tiny bit left. I was to lean forward to help that little bit finish quicker.
The doctor came in to check me and found I was ready to push... which I could have said since my body tried pushing already the previous contraction. My water broke then, and with only 6 minutes of pushing, baby was born at 6:51pm, February 25. But my goodness, that was not a fun six minutes for me! I was thinking it would be more like it was with my son where I didn't even have to think about pushing, my body did it all on its own... I had to actually force myself to try to push this time. It was strange.
"You have a beautiful daughter" we were told, and my little girl was placed on my chest for a little bit. She was almost 20inches long, 8lbs, 11oz, and had a head circumference of 35cm. The placenta came out fine, my husband cut the cord, and then the worst thing started. I bled. And I shook. And my husband had to hold our daughter while the nurses called the doctor back in and did everything to stop the bleeding.
All I could do was pray... pray to stop shaking so they could put in the two IVs, the catheter, and some kind of pill... praying that they could stop the bleeding quickly, praying that God would place his hand on me and protect us. He did. Apparently I overheard that they calculated more than 2 L of blood lost. The nurse that went to check came into the room and it sounded as though she thought the numbers she got were wrong. Another nurse had gone to her and I overheard her saying that she got over 2L, but that couldn't be right (she wasn't in the room when all of this had happened). The nurse that went over to her said that sounded very possible. I guess they were suprised I hadn't passed out or something? I was still completely coherent and talking, clenching my fist for the blood test done shortly afterward (more blood? Really?). Thankfully my hemoglobin levels weren't as low as they suspected, so I didn't need a blood transfusion (which is apparently rare in a loss of that amount). I was able to nurse at 8:30. When they took another test 2 days later, my levels were stable.
We stayed in the hospital for 3 nights. The first night I spent flat in bed. They couldn't raise the bed at all either due to the fear of more loss of blood, or of me fainting. I never once felt faint either. That morning they were able to remove the catheter and the needle from the one IV, which had been removed once it was finished at some point during the night. The other IV was also removed that morning. I actually felt a little more myself, but extremely weak and tired. Our little girl didn't have a name yet, and none that we'd picked was something we liked... I told my husband it could wait. I did not feel well enough to try to think about names at the moment. Early morning, the doctor came in and said that my hemoglobin was low. I could either have a blood transfusion, or take iron supplements. I opted for supplements.
My husband left the hospital for some breakfast. Oh... interesting thing... he went home for a bit and found our fridge and fridge freezer not working. It was defrosting. He got someone in to see if it could be fixed, and they found out that someone had turned the dials both completely off. How? When? This is the mystery. Our door had been left unlocked, so my husband suspects someone decided to have some 'fun' on our behalf. Why anyone would do that, I have no clue. Not to mention I had a lot of our freezer meals for when baby had arrived in that freezer. Thankfully, they caught things before they completely defrosted. I figured maybe the dials had been 'brushed' over to zero. They aren't easy to move though, so that makes no sense either. The kids wouldn't be able to reach them, or turn them off either. Just a little... aside... I suppose.
The last night I was actually transferred to a different room that was a regular room outfitted as maternity overflow. I was forgotten, and couldn't ring nurses (I actually had to go out to look for one when our daughter wouldn't stop crying as she wanted milk and mine hadn't come in yet due to all the blood loss... they gave her some formula so I could get some sleep, and my milk came in an hour later, causing the shakes and more runs and everything... I'm guessing my colostrum was getting ready that early monday morning shaking session... as it seemed to follow a bit of a pattern). They had forgotten to tell me how to lock the shared bathroom doors, or where the nurse call button was. The only reason I knew how to adjust my bed was because my son found the buttons at the foot. I didn't know there were side rails or how to raise them until 5am that morning when the nurses I got out of my room to get showed me. They even forgot to bring my iron supplements to my room that day. Apparently, that was a busy night for the maternity ward! I'm not upset at all, it just made my decision to go home a little easier... even though I felt tired and weak, had the shakes randomly, and couldn't hardly walk long, I was still doing everything myself at the hospital, too. At least at home I had my own shower, my own bathroom, and my own comfortable bed.
I finally went home on February 28th, late in the evening. My hemoglobin is low, but the doctor says it is manageable. I'm taking iron supplements and looking into the foods that I can eat to help raise this quicker. I want my energy back.
I cannot take the stairs more than once a day (to go to bed, and then in the morning to come downstairs). My husband is doing so much, and the kids help a lot too. Our little girl is doing well, and slept better since we arrived home than she did the entire time at the hospital. It may also help that our house isn't as dry. It is so nice to be home again. I found out that M has been cleaning in the house when I was gone. She took a cloth and washed the table of the crayon my son had gotten on there, she cleans up the toys when they are done playing with them, and she has been helping me since we got home to get stuff put away, or on the table, whatever she can! It is so sweet. She also loves her baby sister. She's been talking about her nonstop, wants to hold her, and when I have her on the floor, M is there, touching her face and stroking her hands... it is absolutely adorable.
So, now we are home. M keeps reminding me that now there are 3 of them... her, Bram, and A. Bram likes to watch his baby sister on the floor, and if he accidentally drops something nearby, you hear him say 'sorry'. The kids have been real troopers through all this. And my husband has been wonderful. He is doing so much, making most of our food, helping me with diaper changes when he's around, and lifting the baby to me in bed when I find myself struggling to do so myself. I feel really useless right now as I cannot walk much before I'm exhausted. I can read the kids stories, take care of A's basic needs, go on the computer, and nap. I'm in a lot of pain right now as engorgment has hit (seriously, you'd think I wouldn't produce much milk since my hemoglobin is so low). I need to try to work that out soon. It's the same as it was with M. Actually, A reminds me a lot of M in her mannerisms, everything.
I am tired, but I feel so blessed to finally be home again. Thanks for reading (if you managed to make it through it all, haha). It is almost time for breakfast... would you believe it is difficult to get ingrediants out of the fridge to make pancake batter? Pancake batter. Seriously. I can't wait to feel normal again.
And now, in the words of Tigger (whom the kids have had me reading many many stories of lately), T.T.F.N... Ta ta for now!
Wednesday, before my due date, I started getting a lot of timeable contractions at 10min apart. They would quit for an hour or so, and start up again, so I knew they weren't the real deal. I had them when sitting, standing, shopping, sleeping... it was ridiculous. They continued through the whole weekend. By Sunday I told my husband I wasn't timing them anymore. I was done. I had been questioning labour for 3-4 days now, and my emotions were a wreck. I spent the day blissfully ignoring contractions, praying that God would just let me know.
Midnight on Sunday/Monday I woke up with another one of those silly untimeable light contractions... which gave me the runs and the shakes all at the same time. We went to the hospital to find out why I had shakes so bad for 20 minutes straight, as I was still shaking when we got in the van and strongly felt something was wrong. My in laws came to watch the kids.
Everything seemed fine, and they checked me and said I was 5 cm. We stayed at the hospital, and hours later was said to be 7 cm. No pain, and I was thrilled. Day shift nurse tried to get me to help these contractions get closer, and later on checked me to find... I was 3 cm, and probably had been there awhile. Baby's head was making measuring difficult. So, we waited a little longer to check once more to see if there was any change. None. Left the hospital around noon. Went home crying. I was so hoping to leave with a baby, and instead I was leaving as having been in false labor... and I didn't go in thinking I was in labor to begin with, just concerned with why I was shaking. I felt a little ridiculous.
After lunch we went for naps and I was having those same stupid contractions. When I woke up they were different... closer. 5 minutes apart and stronger than they had been. Chuck was about to go to the barn, and I told him to wait (it was shortly after 4 when I woke up). Within 15 minutes we figured out this was probably the real deal, and went in... again... this time arriving at 5pm.
I was not allowed to leave the room as the contractions were right on top of each other very quickly. I used the ball, which was nice until they needed to strap me into monitors on the bed yet again. Then they got me the phentanol since anything else could harm the baby at this point. I didn't have it for terribly many contractions... they checked me and I was almost done... only a tiny bit left. I was to lean forward to help that little bit finish quicker.
The doctor came in to check me and found I was ready to push... which I could have said since my body tried pushing already the previous contraction. My water broke then, and with only 6 minutes of pushing, baby was born at 6:51pm, February 25. But my goodness, that was not a fun six minutes for me! I was thinking it would be more like it was with my son where I didn't even have to think about pushing, my body did it all on its own... I had to actually force myself to try to push this time. It was strange.
"You have a beautiful daughter" we were told, and my little girl was placed on my chest for a little bit. She was almost 20inches long, 8lbs, 11oz, and had a head circumference of 35cm. The placenta came out fine, my husband cut the cord, and then the worst thing started. I bled. And I shook. And my husband had to hold our daughter while the nurses called the doctor back in and did everything to stop the bleeding.
All I could do was pray... pray to stop shaking so they could put in the two IVs, the catheter, and some kind of pill... praying that they could stop the bleeding quickly, praying that God would place his hand on me and protect us. He did. Apparently I overheard that they calculated more than 2 L of blood lost. The nurse that went to check came into the room and it sounded as though she thought the numbers she got were wrong. Another nurse had gone to her and I overheard her saying that she got over 2L, but that couldn't be right (she wasn't in the room when all of this had happened). The nurse that went over to her said that sounded very possible. I guess they were suprised I hadn't passed out or something? I was still completely coherent and talking, clenching my fist for the blood test done shortly afterward (more blood? Really?). Thankfully my hemoglobin levels weren't as low as they suspected, so I didn't need a blood transfusion (which is apparently rare in a loss of that amount). I was able to nurse at 8:30. When they took another test 2 days later, my levels were stable.
We stayed in the hospital for 3 nights. The first night I spent flat in bed. They couldn't raise the bed at all either due to the fear of more loss of blood, or of me fainting. I never once felt faint either. That morning they were able to remove the catheter and the needle from the one IV, which had been removed once it was finished at some point during the night. The other IV was also removed that morning. I actually felt a little more myself, but extremely weak and tired. Our little girl didn't have a name yet, and none that we'd picked was something we liked... I told my husband it could wait. I did not feel well enough to try to think about names at the moment. Early morning, the doctor came in and said that my hemoglobin was low. I could either have a blood transfusion, or take iron supplements. I opted for supplements.
My husband left the hospital for some breakfast. Oh... interesting thing... he went home for a bit and found our fridge and fridge freezer not working. It was defrosting. He got someone in to see if it could be fixed, and they found out that someone had turned the dials both completely off. How? When? This is the mystery. Our door had been left unlocked, so my husband suspects someone decided to have some 'fun' on our behalf. Why anyone would do that, I have no clue. Not to mention I had a lot of our freezer meals for when baby had arrived in that freezer. Thankfully, they caught things before they completely defrosted. I figured maybe the dials had been 'brushed' over to zero. They aren't easy to move though, so that makes no sense either. The kids wouldn't be able to reach them, or turn them off either. Just a little... aside... I suppose.
The last night I was actually transferred to a different room that was a regular room outfitted as maternity overflow. I was forgotten, and couldn't ring nurses (I actually had to go out to look for one when our daughter wouldn't stop crying as she wanted milk and mine hadn't come in yet due to all the blood loss... they gave her some formula so I could get some sleep, and my milk came in an hour later, causing the shakes and more runs and everything... I'm guessing my colostrum was getting ready that early monday morning shaking session... as it seemed to follow a bit of a pattern). They had forgotten to tell me how to lock the shared bathroom doors, or where the nurse call button was. The only reason I knew how to adjust my bed was because my son found the buttons at the foot. I didn't know there were side rails or how to raise them until 5am that morning when the nurses I got out of my room to get showed me. They even forgot to bring my iron supplements to my room that day. Apparently, that was a busy night for the maternity ward! I'm not upset at all, it just made my decision to go home a little easier... even though I felt tired and weak, had the shakes randomly, and couldn't hardly walk long, I was still doing everything myself at the hospital, too. At least at home I had my own shower, my own bathroom, and my own comfortable bed.
I finally went home on February 28th, late in the evening. My hemoglobin is low, but the doctor says it is manageable. I'm taking iron supplements and looking into the foods that I can eat to help raise this quicker. I want my energy back.
I cannot take the stairs more than once a day (to go to bed, and then in the morning to come downstairs). My husband is doing so much, and the kids help a lot too. Our little girl is doing well, and slept better since we arrived home than she did the entire time at the hospital. It may also help that our house isn't as dry. It is so nice to be home again. I found out that M has been cleaning in the house when I was gone. She took a cloth and washed the table of the crayon my son had gotten on there, she cleans up the toys when they are done playing with them, and she has been helping me since we got home to get stuff put away, or on the table, whatever she can! It is so sweet. She also loves her baby sister. She's been talking about her nonstop, wants to hold her, and when I have her on the floor, M is there, touching her face and stroking her hands... it is absolutely adorable.
So, now we are home. M keeps reminding me that now there are 3 of them... her, Bram, and A. Bram likes to watch his baby sister on the floor, and if he accidentally drops something nearby, you hear him say 'sorry'. The kids have been real troopers through all this. And my husband has been wonderful. He is doing so much, making most of our food, helping me with diaper changes when he's around, and lifting the baby to me in bed when I find myself struggling to do so myself. I feel really useless right now as I cannot walk much before I'm exhausted. I can read the kids stories, take care of A's basic needs, go on the computer, and nap. I'm in a lot of pain right now as engorgment has hit (seriously, you'd think I wouldn't produce much milk since my hemoglobin is so low). I need to try to work that out soon. It's the same as it was with M. Actually, A reminds me a lot of M in her mannerisms, everything.
I am tired, but I feel so blessed to finally be home again. Thanks for reading (if you managed to make it through it all, haha). It is almost time for breakfast... would you believe it is difficult to get ingrediants out of the fridge to make pancake batter? Pancake batter. Seriously. I can't wait to feel normal again.
And now, in the words of Tigger (whom the kids have had me reading many many stories of lately), T.T.F.N... Ta ta for now!
Friday, March 1, 2013
Whole Healing: Weeks 6-9
I have not been keeping up with this lately. Sorry about that.
Week 6 was about forgiving others. Forgiveness is important in our lives for so many reasons. The Bible talks about forgiveness in many places, and God calls us to forgive, not just because we 'have to' but because it is something we need to do for our own release, our own health. I found this challenge difficult only in the matter that I felt the person didn't deserve forgiveness... but forgiveness isn't earned. It is given. And so, I forgave them. Not because I didn't think they deserved it, or that I could still treat them as though I could trust them again (I have to be wary of this individual for many reasons, for the sake of my family and kids), but because I needed to be released from it all myself. That is what forgiveness is for... the person doing the forgiving.
Week 7 is to believe in healing. I wasn't sure what to make of this one. I've always believed in healing... believed in God's ability to heal us when everyone else said nothing will work. The hardest thing for me is anxiety and anger. These need healing too. So, that was my focus for the week.
Week 8 was anxiety. What a week for that one! I found myself saying the verse over and over this week... Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. This was the week prior to my due date. I was dealing with anxiety. A lot. And that prayer was repeated constantly, along with praying about the labor and delivery. I was terrified. Have been for ages, just wouldn't admit to myself that it was actually going to happen. But, praying really helped. And when my contractions started on Wednesday... just braxtons, but they continued to happen every 10 minutes until all of a sudden nothing for an hour. They happened during the night or day, whenever they wanted to. It was insane. But, I'd just pray because I didn't know when labor was actually starting, and it didn't feel like labor yet. I was anxious to know. Nothing like not knowing. So, all you can do at that point is pray.
Week 9 is about picking a food item to grow yourself. I am most interested in choosing something like greens or lettuce. I'll have to think about it further... container gardening is something I'm most interested in right now. I have no other gardening spot. Well, that is this week's challenge anyway. I'm glad it's simpler with all that happened this week. I'll post on that later... as well as another update on the 90 day no sugar challenge...
That's all I'll say for now. If you want to see the challenges and all the other posts on this, look here. I'm signing off for now! Have a great weekend, everyone!
Week 6 was about forgiving others. Forgiveness is important in our lives for so many reasons. The Bible talks about forgiveness in many places, and God calls us to forgive, not just because we 'have to' but because it is something we need to do for our own release, our own health. I found this challenge difficult only in the matter that I felt the person didn't deserve forgiveness... but forgiveness isn't earned. It is given. And so, I forgave them. Not because I didn't think they deserved it, or that I could still treat them as though I could trust them again (I have to be wary of this individual for many reasons, for the sake of my family and kids), but because I needed to be released from it all myself. That is what forgiveness is for... the person doing the forgiving.
Week 7 is to believe in healing. I wasn't sure what to make of this one. I've always believed in healing... believed in God's ability to heal us when everyone else said nothing will work. The hardest thing for me is anxiety and anger. These need healing too. So, that was my focus for the week.
Week 8 was anxiety. What a week for that one! I found myself saying the verse over and over this week... Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. This was the week prior to my due date. I was dealing with anxiety. A lot. And that prayer was repeated constantly, along with praying about the labor and delivery. I was terrified. Have been for ages, just wouldn't admit to myself that it was actually going to happen. But, praying really helped. And when my contractions started on Wednesday... just braxtons, but they continued to happen every 10 minutes until all of a sudden nothing for an hour. They happened during the night or day, whenever they wanted to. It was insane. But, I'd just pray because I didn't know when labor was actually starting, and it didn't feel like labor yet. I was anxious to know. Nothing like not knowing. So, all you can do at that point is pray.
Week 9 is about picking a food item to grow yourself. I am most interested in choosing something like greens or lettuce. I'll have to think about it further... container gardening is something I'm most interested in right now. I have no other gardening spot. Well, that is this week's challenge anyway. I'm glad it's simpler with all that happened this week. I'll post on that later... as well as another update on the 90 day no sugar challenge...
That's all I'll say for now. If you want to see the challenges and all the other posts on this, look here. I'm signing off for now! Have a great weekend, everyone!
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