Some News

Most of my friends and family know this by now... but here's the news anyway...

I'm pregnant!

Right now I'm only 10 weeks, but here's the preggo shot since my belly is showing already.

I can hardly believe how much I'm showing!  I had a flat tummy in May prior to getting pregnant, and it was almost immediately apparent.  At 3 weeks my symptoms started, I tested at 4 1/2 weeks, and I had people saying they had figured it out already (mainly my inlaws who live next door).  I've been sleeping about anywhere I lay down (floor, couch, chair, kids bed...) and I'm having a hard time getting things finished.  My house... ah my poor house... tis neglected.  I get the basics done... you know, vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen... but my fridge, while tidy, hasn't been properly cleaned in over a month (used to do so weekly), I haven't mopped in a while (ugh... and I need to...), and dusting... please don't run your fingers on anything, lol.  No, it's not too bad, i dusted some stuff last week.  My office almost needs it twice a week though somehow.  It's bad in there.  The kids thankfully clean up their toys themselves (I would be in a hurricane of toy mess otherwise) and my husband has been helping make meals when I can't handle it.  This morning was tough... I got up and was wanting to go right back to bed.  I tried to take down my one curtain (got some new ones from my inlaws and I wanted to see how they'd look in the livingroom) but after switching one curtain, I didn't like it, and I couldn't do much but sit down and catch my breath.  Seriously.  That is crazy.  My exercising has gone out the window.  I just can't believe how hard things are right now.

As for food... I'm making different things now as I have noticed that the 'same old' is making me nautious.  I need to try different things with my ingrediants to be able to eat them.  It's been working, and I'm eating a little more nutritiously this last week than I did a few weeks ago (seriously, all we were eating was sandwiches and tomato soup cause I couldn't handle making anything more than that).

I do have one thing... in one week I will be visiting my doctor and hopefully will hear the heartbeat (my uterus is flipped back again, like it has been for all my other pregs, which means it's a bit tougher to hear the heartbeat until later, or even get proper ultrasound).  My tummy feels like it's higher than it has been for either pregnancy.  My uterus usually stays pretty low.  I've tried finding the fundal height for myself, but unfortunately I am having no luck figuring out what is what... so I will rely on my doctor.  I have been wondering since we found out we were expecting if it is going to be one or two.  Didn't have that question with the others, and the only reason I haven't pushed it from my mind completely is that I found out about a friend who didn't have twins in her family, and had twins herself.  I have twins in my dad's side, my husband has twins in his family (I know, that doesn't count for me) but for some reason I have this niggling... that I won't be able to confirm for sure one way or the other until week 20.  And not only that, but I have to find another doctor as mine is sadly leaving the 'baby catching business'.  He said I could stay with him and just have the doc on call, but if my niggles are correct, that puts me in a higher risk category, and I should have an actual obgyn.  I have one in mind... I just need to place some calls.

My goodness... I can't wait until some of these symptoms wear off.

I hope everyone has a great week!

Blogging Blues - And A Confession

Ugh.  I wanted to blog.  Really, I did.  I even wrote two blog posts.  But both of them sounded so... ugh.  Depressing?  Not something anyone would really want to read anyway... so I deleted them.  Plus, with all the interruptions, they didn't seem to make much sense anyway.  ;)

Maybe I should try again?  On a lighter note?  Ahem...

Confession:  Sometimes I want to be nothing for a day.

You saw it here first!  Nothing.  I want to be NOTHING for one day.  Not have any responsibilities, not have to clean up the baby powder sprinkled all over the change table, change poopy diapers, launder clothes that the cat pooped/puked all over, or mow lawn.  Not need to bake or cook or clean the house.  Not have to do dishes or fix boo boos or break up fights over toys I'd love to smash with a hammer (make sure you read that in Emperor's-New-Groove-Yzma's voice.  Haven't seen that movie?  Watch it!  It will make you laugh!).  Absolutely nothing.  For one day.

But I also know one thing.  It would probably only be midway through that one day and I would miss it.  I would remember all the blessings and wonderful things that I forget in the midst of prying my daughter's hair out of my son's fist, or searching for that silly toy once again only to find it went into the floor register.  I would remember the hugs, the 'I love you's, the dances, the kisses, and the smiles.  And I'd miss it.

But right now, I'd still like to be nothing... maybe only for an hour or two.

101 update - it's been a long time

I haven't posted in forever!
I just decided to look over my 101 list and man... I haven't done anything in ages.  I'll give it a quick summary as to what I've 'done' without realizing it.

Environment3. take a nature hike and make educational for kiddos - I really want to do this sometime soon.  We were going to go to a local park for mother's day, but there happened to be a fire in the area so that was postponed indefinetly.
4. change our furnace from oil to electric - we've actually been talking about this.  Along with me planning out our 'new' basement.  Which is a much cheaper and easier endeavor than I first tried to make it.  Open concept basement... yee haw!

Family/Relationship
6. Celebrate five strange holidays (white day, pancake day, etc) - You know, we've done some of these but I cannot remember them all!  I know we recently did 'national slurpee day' by getting a free slurpee from 7 11, and the kids had their own.  They were thrilled (and it was just enough for us).  I also participated in 'National Spa Week' by making a spa day at home for myself after putting the kids to bed.
10. make plans to have a family day twice/month for one year (/24) - oi... we have so much going on that Im not sure how this one is working out.  We do something as a family regularly now.  I'm not sure how to track this (except maybe looking at the WIR's I'm doing to see what we've done and when)
15. go to five local fairs (3/5) - just did #3 last weekend, June 2nd.  It was just me and the kids though as hubby was on the field all day.
17. have a night at home where we explore other cultures (food, map, activity, etc) (2/3)  Did Italy earlier in the year.  :)  It was fun!  Also did China for the Chinese New Year!

Farm/Business
27. Write/publish 3rd book - Sigh.  I need motivation on this one.  I'm currently putting book one up on deviantart and hoping for inspiring comments to get me going on this.  So far nothing.

Financial
34. Save up $10 for each item I complete on this list - frustration on this.  I have an account I wanted to use for this.  It already had a fair amount in it, and I was going to update it as necessary.  I cannot access it online.  It shows me the amount in there, but won't let me put more money in.  I'm going to HAVE to get my butt in gear and find out what is going on.
36. Place at least $10,000 into TFSA’s - about halfway there...

Health/Fitness
DONE!!! 53. Try 20 new recipes (20/20) - I know I did 3 new recipes for the Chinese day, and another 4 for Italy day...  so this is DONE.

Hobbies
58. Catch up on scrapbooking (digital) - slowly... very slowly... haven't been much into scrapbooking lately.
63. Do a ‘week in review’ scrapbook for one year (at least) and print it - I have it done and have continued into 2012 but I have yet to print it.
64. Try to finish cross stitch - I'm never going to do this.  I should just sell it.

House/Home
DONE!!! 67. Redo living room (couches, etc) - well... I think we did this one!  Bought new couches a number of months ago (I cannot remember when exactly) and they look great!  It's not perfect, but it is so much nicer than before!
68. Renovate basement - I'm in the planning stages right now...
69. Build another bedroom - another plan in the planning stage.  It will be a while before these come to fruition.
72. Build a sandbox/play area for kids - oi, I really want a sandbox for them.  Everything else is coming along!  Swings (thanks Kim!), a playhouse, toys in a bin...
DONE!!! 73. Put up 10 picture frames/wall art - I put 3 frames in our room, one in the kids room, one in the hall, two candle sconces in the entrance, two decorative 'shelf' candle holders in our room, and our shelf in the diningroom... which holds wall art.  I'd say I've done this... now to print the photos and put them in the frames (I hung them so they remind me, but I haven't done it yet.  Figures).

Organizing
80. Purge old toys that aren’t played with (remove at least 25lbs of toys from house 7/25) - I have boxes of stuff in my basement ready to go... they just haven't left the house yet so I can't count them.
DONE!!! 82. Create an organizational system in my wardrobe unit for crafts/scrapbooking - I did this!  Why haven't I marked this as done?  Man, it's been ages.  I did this back in 2011.  I'll have to look up when.

Spiritual
DONE!!! 86. buy a new devotional and use it - got one for Christmas from my sister and have been through the entire thing.  Back in February already.
87. start reading a Bible verse at the table at suppertime (maybe find a ‘daily bread’ or something small we can do as a family) - found some verses to use.  Now to print them and make a jar to pull them out of.
So... I've actually been doing things!  Wow!  Now to update the actual list so I don't forget again and lose it all, haha.  Too bad I haven't been keeping on top of this.  I have no actual dates for stuff.  :(

Happy Chinese New Year

For fun this year, since I didn't really get into Christmas until after it was over due to lack of snow, I decided we were going to celebrate SOMETHING in January... which is often an overlooked month except for our New Year... which is more often celebrated on Dec 31, and not so much in January. Looking at the calendar, I noticed the Chinese New Year was occuring on the 23rd of the month! How neat! So, for fun, we decided to look it up, and discovered a few interesting things.

Food on Chinese New Years eve is very important! The foods you eat either resemble, or their names are similar to things pertaining to riches and long life. Dumplings are apparently a big thing, as are long noodles, long beans (both due to the belief of having a long life... so don't cut your noodles), fish (I know I read why, but I cannot remember at the moment), and lots of sweets and such. I decided we'd make a meal for our supper just for our family and celebrate with that.

So, we made chicken stir fry (we were out of fish... sigh) with noodles instead of rice, and I made dumplings... first time ever! It was suprisingly not too difficult, and since I didn't have a number of the regular ingrediants for the filling, I just made my own. I made a total of 12... as that was all the dough I made (although I think I made them too thick as the dough should have made 20... and I had a lot of leftover filling). It took a few dumplings to get the folds to look nice, but none opened up in the boiling water, and they were all eaten by my family. I think I'd like to attempt these again. Perhaps later today I'll make more dough and use the rest of the filling (that is a lot of chopping... I read that using a food processor makes the filling too fine and gummy, and it doesn't have the correct texture, so I hand minced it all).

For dessert I whipped up a batch of almond cookies. I looked up Chinese desserts for the New Year, and this was the only one I had all the ingrediants to. I just did a half batch, of 15 cookies, and they were a hit as well! Mmmm... almond...

For breakfast this morning (the official New Year using the lunar calendar), we had dragon fruit and tea marbled eggs. The dragon fruit we picked because it is now the year of the dragon. The tea marbled eggs I came across during my search for Chinese New Year recipes, and it looked interesting, with ingredients I normally have, so I made them! It was easy, too! And M loved them (Bram doesn't like hardboiled eggs). They had a nice flavor to them.

Don't these look tasty? I loved the effect of the marbling on the eggs! I soaked them for overnight, but I didn't have black tea, which would have made the eggs darker yet. I just used... blackcurrant tea, hahaha. It has 'black' in it... :P

Lastly, I made some red money envelopes for each of the kids. I didn't have looney's or tooney's or anything, so they got 4 pennies each. I know... cheap... but I'm actually giving them each $1.12... or any one thing they want from Dollarama. I also found out how to write their names in Chinese symbols (well, my daughter's isn't exactly right as they didn't have any name or word like her name), so I wrote them in sparkly gell glue on the backs of the cards, and used a Mickey sticker to close it for Bram, and a Hello Kitty sticker for M.

I will have to post the recipes later on in my cookbook... I will probably try them again. Although, next thing I want to celebrate is Valentine's Day... and I think I may be doing another '14 days of Valentine's'... :) Just because I can... and it's fun... :)

Putting HIM First

I just posted about the tribulation here, and this post has a little something to do with it. But not about it directly. No, this as about God's placement in our lives.

A few nights ago, while reading Luke 17, I had a brief vision. Here are the verses...

The Coming of the Kingdom of God20 Once, on being asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come, Jesus replied, “The coming of the kingdom of God is not something that can be observed, 21 nor will people say, ‘Here it is,’ or ‘There it is,’ because the kingdom of God is in your midst.”[c]22 Then he said to his disciples, “The time is coming when you will long to see one of the days of the Son of Man, but you will not see it. 23 People will tell you, ‘There he is!’ or ‘Here he is!’ Do not go running off after them. 24 For the Son of Man in his day[d] will be like the lightning, which flashes and lights up the sky from one end to the other. 25 But first he must suffer many things and be rejected by this generation.26 “Just as it was in the days of Noah, so also will it be in the days of the Son of Man. 27 People were eating, drinking, marrying and being given in marriage up to the day Noah entered the ark. Then the flood came and destroyed them all.28 “It was the same in the days of Lot. People were eating and drinking, buying and selling, planting and building. 29 But the day Lot left Sodom, fire and sulfur rained down from heaven and destroyed them all.30 “It will be just like this on the day the Son of Man is revealed. 31 On that day no one who is on the housetop, with possessions inside, should go down to get them. Likewise, no one in the field should go back for anything. 32 Remember Lot’s wife! 33 Whoever tries to keep their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life will preserve it. 34 I tell you, on that night two people will be in one bed; one will be taken and the other left. 35 Two women will be grinding grain together; one will be taken and the other left.” [36] [e]37 “Where, Lord?” they asked.He replied, “Where there is a dead body, there the vultures will gather.”

The thing that got me was "Remember Lot's Wife!" and I had a quick momentary wondering of what would happen if we would dare to 'look back' at the farm in that moment. I realized that the farm itself, while my home now, is not that important to me in the end, and instead, I got this little 'dream'.

I was at home. I heard a trumpet and looked up, and there was Jesus, in the clouds, his arms open, people everywhere, and my heart soared! I was just about to raise my arms to come to him when I thought of my children and my husband. I stopped, turned my head to look for them, and when I turned back, He was gone. I missed him. I cried... and in all honesty I tear up just remembering it.

Now, I'm not saying that God would not allow us to look for our families. He knows they are important to us. What I am saying is... God spoke to ME in this. He may have a different message for you, but for me the message was clear. "Am I more important than these?" He told me that He loves my husband and children much more than I ever could... and He loves me more than anything. I need to remember that. I cannot be like Lot's wife. I cannot turn back for ANYTHING. Not that God would turn me to salt if I did, but that's not my point right now. Jesus said not to be like Lot's wife. HE is first. "Oh, wait God, I just need to quickly grab something..." doesn't happen if HE is your EVERYTHING. It doesn't happen if you trust him for everything. It... just... doesn't. I need to make sure I put Him before everything in my life, make him first... all else will follow. It's that simple... or hard... depending on how you look at it.

I cannot be in control of my children's or my husband's or any of my loved ones decision to accept Christ. I cannot control their placement of God in their lives. All I can do is pray for them, and put Him first in my own. I am in control of myself, and only myself.

And I must make the decision to put God FIRST.

This whole thing reminded me very strongly of a dream I had years ago. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I had one miscarriage scare... which sparked a series of miscarriage dreams. I lost our first child only months earlier, and so, this was all very frightening for me. I felt very strongly that God told me we would not lose this one... and so in every dream, as I was dreaming I would pray, 'but Lord, you told me I wouldn't lose this one, so I cannot be having a miscarriage', even though all the signs and everyone around me in the dream was saying otherwise... I would cry, and then I would hear God say "Don't worry, *my name*, this is only a dream. You are not losing your baby." and I would wake up and all would be fine.

One day, during my devotions, I'm not sure what I read, but while I was praying I felt very strongly that God was asking me "Am I more important than all of these". "What do you mean, Lord?" "Am I more important than all of these?" I became agitated... what if this meant losing everything... my husband, my baby, my home, my family... what would come of me? He asked me again "Am I more important to you than all of these things" and it was then that I had the overwhelming sense that he didn't want to take things away from me, He wanted me to know and discover... if I had nothing that I have now, would I still love Him? And you know what? I did. I realized that if I kept everything I had, but didn't have Him, I would be very upset. I would hate it. But even if everything I had was taken from me... as long as He didn't leave me, I would be ok in the end. I cried... I don't want to lose anybody that I have in this world... but I felt peace.

I never had another miscarriage dream again.

I believe this little vision was a reminder of that night so many years ago. A reminder that I need to make sure that He is above all else in my life. I can love and enjoy all the wonderful gifts He has given me, in fact He would want me to enjoy those things, but I can't make them more important than the one who gave them to me. I need to keep perspective. And that perspective is that without God, I could have everything, and yet have nothing. HE needs to be the forefront of my life, and I need to be reminded of that every day.